Latina on a Mission

As noted in a previous post, I was able to admire the new Hallmark Kids Collection at Blissdom at the Hallmark booth. Hallmark writer Sarah Mueller who helped develop their new line was on hand to show me several of the cards.

In the video below, we discussed the importance of encouraging children and how I have used cards to encourage mine over the years.

Want to share one with a child in your life?  Click HERE to find out how to get a FREE Hallmark Kids Collection card! 

Enjoy!

Note: I have to thank Corvida of SheGeeks.net for taking my sons to lunch while I was at the event.  Corvida’s passion for social media and all that it entails is inspiring to see!  Click HERE to go to her site.

There are a slew of great organizations helping Haitians in Haiti. However, it did not just affect the Haitians in Haiti, many residing within New York City have been adversely affected as well. As such, I am happy to announce that NYC has opened the New York Haitian Earthquake Family Resource Center. It is comprised of several agencies, including The Salvation Army.

The Salvation Army has been in Haiti since 1950 running 60 community centers, 49 schools and several orphanages and clinics with over 700 staff. They recently distributed 550,000 meals in 4 hours - just one of the many big projects they’ve been coordinating in Haiti; however, your continued help is still needed. It can be provided at www.salvationarmyusa.org, 1-800-SAL-ARMY or by texting  HAITI to 52000 to donate $10.

The Center, with support from The Salvation Army, will include the below noted services.

• Creole-speaking interpretation services;
• Assistance with completing Temporary Protected Status applications and other immigration-related assistance;
• Access to telephones to contact appropriate federal and Haitian officials;
• Use of computers for consulting a broad range of websites, including New York State’s Registry of New York Citizens in Haiti;
• Child guardianship and custody services;
• Legal information; and
• Grief counseling

Assessments are also being done at the end of a family’s visit to the center to see if there are outstanding needs that could be met in the future. 

Please click HERE to view the google document.

Note, the Center will not take donations of cash or goods.

I read a lot of blogs. Many times as I read I think, “I know that feeling, its happened to me!”  Its at those time when I wish I was able to speak directly to the writer and say, “It’ll be OK. I know.”

When I was hungry, someone came along and brought me food, bags and bags of food. When I was thrown out and cast aside, feeling  forgotten and unloved, a long lost Titi /Aunt raised me as her own.  When facing eviction with a 3 year old son, I received an unexpected check. It was enough to cover the rent. When I was in court defending my son, feeling terrified and alone, crying in despair, a stranger prayed with me. When as a new driver, I  drove over 50 miles, with my sons in the backseat, at 2 a.m. forgetting to put on my headlights, weaving in and out of traffic and crying with despair, I made it to my destination…unscathed. There are so many other times I can name but suffice it to say, I survived. My boys and I survived.

Along the way, I learned I’m not alone. I never was. There was always a hand guiding me, rescuing me, holding me. When I thought I couldn’t go any further, it nudged me and yes sometimes even shoved me!   

Now that I understand, I can vocalize it. It was God keeping us all along. So when friends ask, “How can you be so happy and cheery when you’ve gone through so much?” I reply, “Because of  Him.”

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29.11 (NLV) 

Powerful: having great power, authority, or influence

******************** 

Powerful, as defined by dictionary.com, means having great power, authority or influence. The wielder of such power can sway others towards something better, something greater, something higher.  By building others, it creates power in others.  Yet this doesn’t take away from the wielder’s power, in fact, it increases it, enabling the cycle to continue, growing larger and larger with each turn.

We are all wielders of power. We wield power over our children, our families, our friends. Yet some take that power to another level, using their influence to plant a seed, nurturing and watering it as it grows into the maginifcant Palm Tree it’s meant to be!

Pine-Sol has created a wonderful program to celebrate those who are using their power to make “A Powerful Difference”. The Pine-Sol Powerful Difference program first started in 2007. Since that time the program has awarded dozens of grants to over 80 difference makers.  This year they are continuing the program, where they will award grants online to women who are helping improve their communities and are making extraordinary change.

One grand prize winner will receive $10,000 to make a powerful difference for their community or cause and an additional nine finalists will receive $1,000 to help support their initiatives. To be eligible, entrants must apply online at www.PowerfulDifference.com by March 22, 2010.

Below I have noted the requirements to enter:

• Upload an essay, of 200 words or less,  on how you are making a powerful difference in your community

• 1 grand prize winner will receive $10,000 to make a powerful difference for their community and be featured in EBONY magazine.

• 9 top finalists will receive $1,000 to help support their community initiatives.

A panel of judges will then select the 10 Powerful Difference Maker finalists based on originality, creativity and relevance to theme, but ultimately it will be up to the general public to help vote for the lucky grand prize winner. People can vote daily for their favorite essay from April 7-21, 2010. The grand prize winner will be announced by May 5, 2010.

Click HERE to go to the Powerful Difference website.

Good luck to all my POWERFUL readers!

Do you recall the movie Hook with Robin Williams as Peter Pan?  He and his pals, the Lost Boys, grew up in Neverland, a place where most stayed children forever, never growing up, escaping all the responsibilities that come with age. Eventually they were “rescued” and did grow up. When they did, one particular Lost Boy, Toodles, was seen searching for his lost marbles. He searched high and low for that sack of marbles, to no avail!

Everyone believed Toodles had gone senile. Yet Toodles only appeared senile because no one knew the secret of those marbles. I like to think I do. I think each marble in that bag represented a possibility, a hope,  for Toodles. Without his marbles or “possibilities”, he was lost!

Just like Toodles, I use marbles to visualize my possibilities. Each year, I place 365 marblesin a vase. Each marble represents a day. In the evening, I remove one marble from the vase, reflecting on my day. As time passes, the vase gets emptier, reminding me that each day is precious…my marbles are precious. Unlike Toodles, a fictitious character, my marbles can be lost or ”wasted”, but they can never be found.  They are irreplaceable.

In this game of marbles, you don’t need to “knuckle down” and there are no  “keepsies”.   One marble must be used every day. Each one bringing a fresh start,  a hope, a possibility. 

Now that you know the secret, how will you make your marbles count?  

My vase with 4 marbles left for the year

Do you recall the “Love Is. . .” cartoons by Kim Casali? They were a collection of cartoons expressing what “Love is…” As a young girl, I recall enjoying those cartoons and thinking that is how my mate would treat me. Yet reality is very different from cartoons for some tweens and teens. It is hurtful, abusive, and violent.

On December 3, 2009, Liz Claiborne held their annual event, “Time to Talk”*. The event aimed to bring teen relationship abuse to the forefront, with several domestic violence experts, as well as parents and teens who had experienced it firsthand.

While at the event, I was able to speak with several domestic violence experts, including Stephanie Nilva, the Executive Director of Day One.  She explained that one in three teens will experience relationship abuse in some shape or form. The numbers are even more saddening when you take into account the unreported abuse. For this reason, parents need to discuss this issue with their children while they are young. Instilling in their child what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior provides them with knowledge that can save them. Trust must also be established while they are young so that they will not be afraid to seek help. If, however, your children are already tweens and teens, Ms. Nilva stressed the importance of being very open, patient and non-judgemental when discussing relationship abuse. Doing so, will give them the opportunity to open up if they are already in such a relationship.

However, parents must do more than talk. They must listen. Bincy Jacob, of My Sisters’ Place, brought up this  important reminder when she stated, “Teens are already marginalized. They are silenced in so many ways.”   By gaining their voice, they can vocalize what is occuring and can than seek help.

Sadly, 17 year old Aneese Michelle Rivera did not find her voice in time. She was murdered by her boyfriend and two of his friends on October 3, 2008. Martiza Rivera, her Aunt and a New York State Action Leader for a  national coalition called MADE: Moms and Dads for Education to Stop Teen Dating Abuse, spoke to me about their ordeal.  As noted by Maritza, “friends and family all saw the warning signs but didn’t know where to go or what to do for help … I firmly believe that had there been any kind of education or awareness made regarding Teen Dating Violence and Abuse in the community, media and especially in the schools that Aneese and all the other victims who have fallen prey to their abusers, would still be with us today.”  Watch the video below. Hear the story in Maritza’s own words.

Learn the signs. Empower yourself. Discuss it with your children.  Join MADE: Moms and Dads for Education to Stop Teen Dating Abuse. Sign the pledge. Raise awareness in your community. End teen dating abuse. 

Click below to download FREE copies of the following books or pamphlets:

• Tough Talk: What boys need to know about relationship abuse
• A Parent’s Guide to Teen Dating Violence: 10 Questions to Start the Conversation
• What You Need to Know About Dating Violence: A Teen’s Handbook
• A Woman’s Handbook: A Practical Guide to Discussing Relationship Abuse
• A Parent’s Handbook:How to Talk to Your Children About Developing Healthy Relationships
• Informational Brochures in English and Spanish
• The ‘No More’ Fact Sheet

If you are a teen in an abusive relationship (ages 13-18), you can call The National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline (NTDAH) at 1-866-331-9474 or 1-866-331-8453 for the Deaf, Deaf-Blind and Hard of Hearing. It is a 24-hour national web-based and telephone resource serving all 50 states, Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands. You can also initiate a live chat by clicking HERE.

*Disclosure: I received a $50 Juicy Couture gift card for participating in Liz Claiborne’s “Time To Talk” event.

This week I am featuring a family who has inspired me with their story. They are using their grief to help others who may be going through similar circumstances. I applaud and join with them in their fight!

As parents, we want to believe that we can move mountains for our children.  Yet sometimes it isn’t always possible, unless we have help. That is why I will match up to a hundred dollars donated to the Playroom of  Hope. Will you join in a tax deductible gift?  If you aren’t able to donate, grab the Playroom of Hope badge found on their website and spread the word! Either way, leave me a comment below because together we can move this mountain!

Click HERE to see the Wallace story in the news.

Click HERE to go to the Playroom of Hope blog, a non-profit organization.

“You must be the change you wish to see in the world.”

~Mahatma Ghandi

If you would like to nominate a blog, person, company or product for the Inspirational Feature please click HERE

Are you different? Do you sometimes feel as if you do not fit in? Or perhaps try too hard to fit the mold? If so, thats ”The Beauty of Different”.

Karen Walrond, a keynote speaker at Blogalicious 2009, tried to fit the mold for several years. She followed the pattern most of us were taught: attend college, obtain a degree(s), join the workforce and climb the ladder. By society’s standard she had achieved the American Dream. She was prosperous, earning a salary most of us would envy, with material goods that many of us will never see. Yet was she happy? No. She cried every morning before going to work, had anxiety and wasn’t centered. Worth it? Not on your life.    

Karen was different. She felt it. Others did as well. As she stated, “I wasn’t what they expected.” Yet this difference made her stand out. It wasn’t a detriment because she didn’t let it become one. Do you?

Look around you.

What do you see?

I see people of all shapes and sizes, rushing through life, racing to get to the finish line. A line that never seems to get any closer then it was before they started the race. The money, the cars, the houses all seem to get grander as they  race along and shrink and shrivel.

What do you see?

I see a select few, daring to be different. A pep in their step, a radiant smile, a joy that cannot be absconded. They do not race along or wear the masks. They are a splash of color in a world of gray. They. Are. Different. 

What do you see?

Look in the mirror.  Embrace yourself.

Then dare to be different,  dare to be beautiful, dare to be you. 

Luncheon and afternoon keynote by Karen Walrond was sponsored by  Disney Interactive Studios.

This November we’re starting a new feature on Latina On a Mission called “Inspirational Sunday”.  The posts will feature an inspirational person, blog, company and/or small business that I have come across or that has been recommended to me.

I’m hoping these posts will inspire and empower you to reach for your dreams and goals just as the individuals/companies on the featured posts have done! They were not limited by circumstances or by society’s norms, they created a trail within the forest, accomplishing their dreams/goals because they believed!

If you know of an individual, blogger or small business that should be considered, please fill out the contact form below so that we can share their story with others! Its a GREAT way to promote their (or your) services and/or achievements. It’s also a wonderful way to show your appreciation of someone (ex. your mother, co-worker, friend) who has helped you in your journey. Acknowledging them on Latina On a Mission, shouts it to the world, creating a footprint of their feat and/or yours on the net that will inspire and empower others.  Can you imagine their joy? It’s a memory that they will treasure and so will we!

Gracias/Thank you!

Note: If more information is required an e-mail will be sent to the e-mail address included in the form above. 

Before I went into Corporate Law, I worked in ECAB in the District Attorney’s Office. ECAB (Early Case Assessment Bureau), is where felony and misdemeanor cases are evaluated and complaints are drafted. As a paralegal in the department, I interrogated victims, witnesses, and the police officers who conducted the arrests. I collected the information that was presented before the Grand Jury, speaking to the individuals when they were most raw and vulnerable. During that time I dealt with a variety of cases; however,  because of my demeanor I was eventually handed most of the Domestic Violence cases. It was a hard job, extremely draining because of the types of emotional and physical abuse I witnessed. They were not limited to abusive husbands beating on wives. They also included wives abusing husbands, children abused by parents, and elders abused by children.

This week was a particularly hard week for me. A loved one, who I cherish dearly is battling abuse. This person did not come to me but instead reached out to another “friend”. She was ashamed and frightened, with no money and no place to go. She showed up at this “friend’s” door and was allowed to stay for a few days but than told she had to go back. She left and returned to the abusive relationship.

I am devastated! I spoke to her but she said she had to go back because she had no place to go. I offered my residence but she does not want to place me and my children in the middle. I desperately want to help her but she will not allow me.

I am also very upset with the person she approached. I cannot believe that this individual allowed her to go back to that home. 

As someone who saw firsthand what can happen in these cases, I am scared for her. It takes courage for a victim to leave. It takes courage for the victim to reach out.  It takes courage for a victim to HOPE. If its not received at that time, the abused person may not seek help again, believing that is their lot.  I am praying that she will reach out again. In fact, I am praying for all the other individuals going through these same situations.

Please know that you are valuable. You are important and you do deserve a better life.

As for the individuals they approach for help, please keep in mind that your hand may be the only one they have the strength to reach for. Please don’t turn them away.

Courtesy of G.I.R.L.S.

While watching one of my favorite television shows, it was pleasantly interrupted by an ad singing the song “Grandma’s Hands” as it depicted a grandmother enjoying a moment with her grandchildren. As I enjoyed this short drama, I envisioned my own grandmother and thought about the things she taught me and the values she instilled in me. She made sure I attended church every Sunday and molded me into the fine woman I am today.

This fast-paced and overburdened era that we live in today provides little time to spend “quality time” with our grandmothers. “Grandma’s Hands” provided the backbone of our culture upbringing and marked the beginning of generations of great women.

So my Latinalicious sisters, in honor of Mother’s Day which is fast approaching, think about a special grandmother – either yours or someone else’s and do something nice for her. Also, don’t forget your mom and yourself, for we all deserve to be treated special not just on this day but everyday.

Over the years women have been led to believe that no matter what the circumstance, we can do and have it all.  We continually prove this by running around all day attempting to complete one job after another, and never saying “no” to the constant favors we are asked to do.  From birth we are groomed to be the cook, maiden, beautician, sex kitten, wife, mother, teacher, homework assistant, nurse psychologist, transporter, entertainer, healer carpenter and the list goes on.  While all of these things that we do are wonderful, are they necessary? Can we say no to the many unwanted requests?  How many women can stand up to the daily pressures of giving and providing without eventually becoming burned out or consumed with illnesses?

Sometimes women’s lives may feel as if they running on a treadmill and are unable to get off.  They may feel as if they are constantly moving, but can never get ahead or get any task completed. This leads to overload, fatigue, exhaustion, weight problems, stress, confusion, insomnia, hypertension and a host of other problems.  My advice for you today is to stop trying to be a superwoman and start trying to be a list chopper.  Deal with the major needs of life and chop off those minor issues that move you off course.  Those things arise to drain and deplete us of our energy, beauty, youth, creativity and productivity.

Try this for a week – before going to bed at night, make a list of chores of things you would like to accomplish for the next day.  The first one to five hundred things on the list (it does seem that long right?) should range from being the absolute most important to the least important. You will discover that by the end of your week, by chopping off the least important items from your list you would have created more “me time” for yourself.

That “me time” can be used to enjoy a cup of herbal tea, take a long walk, exercise or go to the gym, get a massage, watch your favorite television show, get your hair done, get that badly needed manicure/pedicure, write in your journal, read a book, get your sexy on, or whatever you do to enjoy yourself. 

Remember my Latinalicious sisters don’t sacrifice your own well-being, you were born to be beautiful, energetic and happy, so in remembrance of this – stop being superwomen and become list choppers, creating a better, more fulfilled and happier you!

I balance my checkbook every week but once a month I do a total overhaul. This means I pull out all my monthly bills, review the terms and rates then enter them into my trusty excel chart and voilà! I have my debt to income ratio. Its a work of art. Ok it really isn’t but it keeps me on track so I love it! This chart’s very important for me because I am a visual person. I need to see the breakdown or I may relapse into my old spending habits.

This month while looking over my excel chart, I saw a note I  had written about my car insurance. It said that I would be up for a good driving discount in 2009. I was ecstatic! That discount would cut my annual bill by $100 or more. This may not seem like much to you but I saw visions of shoes floating in my head!

I called No Name Insurance and spoke to a very nice woman we will call “China”.  Why? I don’t know, its the only thing I could think of while writing this. Pero oye dejame terminar la estoria/But listen let me finish telling you my story!

The conversation went a little like this:

China: ThankyouforcallingNoNameInsuranceThisisChinaHowcanIhelpyou?

Ms. Latina: Huh? (Note: I hadn’t had my cafe yet) Can you repeat that you were speaking too quickly.

China: *Sigh* Thank … you… for … calling… NO… NAME… INSURANCE…This … is… China…How…can…I…help…you?

Ms. Latina: (thinking wow do you think she was being sarcastic?!) Hi China, I’m calling to inquire about getting the Good Driver rate reduction.

China: Let me look into that for you.

Ms. Latina: I’m so excited! I wrote myself a reminder and it says I should be eligible this year.

China: *PAUSE* After reviewing your account, it looks like you had an accident in May 2004. You won’t be eligible for the discount till May 2009; however,since you renewed your policy this past February you will have to wait till the policy expires to get the reduction.

MsLatina:  Huh? (ever the eloquent one) But I don’t understand. Can I call in May and have the reduction pro-rated for the remainder of the policy?

China then proceeded to tell me I could not. We hung up shortly thereafter. Now you must be wondering where the frozen  chicken comes in right? You may be thinking I threw it at the phone in a fit of rage or even that I decided to cook up a scrumptious meal to get the images of the shoes I lost out of my head but I was thinking about the accident I had forgotten.

It was a warm sunny day in Long Island, where I used to live in my Mrs. Latina days. I was out for a solitary drive. I had the sunroof open in my new car, with the windows down and a new CD, the Black Eyed Peas, playing in the stereo. I was jamming on that LIE, no not a lie, the Long Island Expressway! When out of the corner of my eye, I see a frozen chicken wrapped nice and tight on the side of the road. For some reason, I couldn’t take my eyes off that chicken! I was mesmerized. Now I can’t recall for certain what I was thinking but I’m sure it was- what the heck is a frozen chicken doing on the side of the road?! As my mind is wrapping itself around that I hear a huge BAMMMMM! Ms. Latina hit not one but FOUR cars, with her no longer new looking car, causing a BIG pile-up on that very sunny Saturday morning and an even BIGGER raise in my insurance!

What do you get out of this story? I’ll tell you. 

Always, always, always look out for the chicken but don’t get stuck on it,  like I did,  because in life there’s always a chicken around that will cause you to lose sight of your goal!